Emotionally Focused Therapy
EFT Vancouver
EFT for Couples in Vancouver BC
Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) is an innovative approach to couples therapy with strong empirical backing. Developed originally in Vancouver, B.C., and now recognized
internationally, EFT marriage counselling (couples relationship therapy) assists emotionally
distressed couples in creating new, more positive interactions and attachments. It does this by helping couples to access and express the deeper feelings and dependency needs in their
relationships.
Following a description of the effectiveness of EFT and its theory of love, attachment theory, I illustrate my approach as a registered Counselling-Psychologist with the clinical case of a
distressed couple experiencing relationship problems.
Effectiveness of Emotion Focused Therapy
I was fortunate to participate in the early development of Emotionally Focused Therapy in
Vancouver. In the mid 1980s, I was a secondary therapist in the original outcome study of EFT at UBC conducted by its originators, Dr. Leslie Greenberg and Dr. Susan Johnson. Next, I was a primary therapist in the second research study demonstrating EFT's effectiveness, conducted by Dr. Greenberg and Dr. Audrey Goldman. Finally, I conducted a constructive outcome study in 1987 for my doctoral dissertation. This study compared the effectiveness of twelve sessions of EFT couples counselling to eight sessions of EFT plus four sessions of a communication skills training component. The results showed that both treatments were effective in shifting couples from distressed to non-distressed compared to a wait-list control group.
Call 604-872-0222 or click here to book a consultation with Dr. Paul James.
EFT Theory of Love Attachment
The theory of EFT Vancouver is predicated on a theory of relatedness called attachment theory. Developed fifty years ago by John Bowlby, who studied the psychological adjustment of babies and children who were orphaned during the Second World War, Bowlby concluded that all humans possess an innate yearning for trust and security, or attachment. Children have needs for attachment with at least one parent, and adults have these needs with a romantic partner. According to attachment theory, every individual has a legitimate yearning for a secure attachment to a significant partner. A secure attachment is understood as a close, trusting relationship in which each person experiences fulfillment of legitimate dependency needs for contact/comfort, and acceptance/safety. In a secure attachment, both people experience the relationship as a safe haven, a source of security and nurture rather than distress.
Emotionally Focused Therapy rejects the view that relationship conflict is a reflection of
character deficits or flaws of the individuals. Instead, this attachment style of counselling understands conflictual partners' negative behaviour as an understandable response
to the frustration of the legitimate need for a secure attachment. When people can't get attachment figures to respond to them and their needs, they do whatever they have to do to get a response. If a child feels unprotected by his parents, for example, he might become defiant, clingy, or withdrawn. A child who is maladjusted, said Bowlby, is often driven by a broken or insecure attachment with his parents.
It follows from attachment theory that when partners are in conflict, they no longer experience a secure attachment to their partner. This might arise when one partner is unsupportive or emotionally unavailable, causing the other to experience insecurity. In EFT any breaches of attachment between partners are called “attachment injuries”, which over time unless resolved move the couple toward a distressed state characterized by a negative fight cycle. In a distressed state, partners tend to see each other in a negative light: as selfish, mean-spirited, withholding, and the cause of their distress emotions.
My approach to Emotionally Focused Therapy is also informed by registered psychologist Dr.
Geoffrey Carr's, Making Happiness. Dr. Carr advances the innovative theory that it is intrusive
feelings that underlie insecure attachments and distressed relationships (for an introduction to his notion of intrusive feelings, see the article, Intrusive Feelings).
Finally, couples attachment therapy maintains that the negative fight cycle is partner's misguided but well-intentioned attempt to establish a secure attachment. In EFT attachment counselling, the negative fight cycle is seen as a stress reaction to partners' fears of lost intimacy and security. The goal is to help distressed couples change their negative cycle and to establish a secure attachment in which their dependency needs for contact/comfort and acceptance/safety are met.
Dr. Paul James is a registered psychologist who specializes in Vancouver sex therapy, EFT and relationship counselling and individual therapy for mental health. Dr. Paul James is accepting new clients and is usually able to accommodate clients within one week.
Call 604-872-0222 or click here to book a consultation with Dr. Paul James.
Dr. Paul S. James
Registered Psychologist #975
Contact Us
Dr. Paul S. James, Ed.D.
Email: info@pauljames.ca
King Edward/Oak St. Office.
Phone: (604) 873-0222